There are moments in nightmares when terror overwhelms us as we realise that nothing is as we thought it was. Thanks to the wisdom of Biased BBC, we can now see that our beloved Auntie Beeb is not the benign old friend we imagined: Auntie is nothing less than a death cult, says Biased BBC's Angel of Mercy, St David Vance. (This is because BBC News has been debating assisted suicide.)
As ever the bias-hunters set to their work of deconstructing The BBC's death-dealing ways; puppy-dog keen poster Paddy finds a neat parallel between The BBC and its own coverage:
I know a pateint.
So long as you don't claim to have invented the iPod you should be all right.
A patient? My mistake. How is he?
They have come to the end of their productive lives.
Lives? A Buddhist, or a Hindu, or possibly the victim of an unscrupulous hypnotist, perhaps?
All they do all day is excrete bile
Quite unlike Biased BBC.
and purile exudate.
Snot true, surely?
They have lost all their mental capacities and stumble along blindly in such a deluded state that one can only pity them. Better to put them out of their misery now before they lose whats left of their remaining dignity.
Who is this deluded soul? Or souls, depending on your grasp of the concepts of singular and plural?
Now where can i find a pillow big enough to cover the face of the BBC?
Far too kind, Paddy. Our made-up opinion poll suggests Biased BBC readers would vote 4-1 in favour of a chainsaw.
Speaking of bloody mayhem, what does legendary social commentator Martin make of the euthanasia debate? Or is he too busy poking around among the turds?
They day you can't wipe your own arse is the day in my view enough is enough.
Knew that arses would feature somewhere. Well done.