Charicteristically Luvie Propoganda

Biased BBC has two languages all of its own. One is the legendary Advanced Vance™, a dialect spoken largely by its leader, David Vance.

The other is an odd collection of words and catchphrases, most of them common to other grumpy mad right-wing fresh, alternative blog sources, but with the occasional newly coined bon mot.

The most common word in this patois is Beeboid. Today, puppy-dog keen poster Paddy has published his draft definition. With lexicograpy this good, an entry in the Oxford English Dictionary cannot be far away.

Beeboid N.

1.Member of BBC staff (Family or supporter) charicteristically anti capitalist, anti christian, anti semitic, anti american, anti science, anti tory anti western anti US republican, anti family anti royalist anti british anti murdoch anti private sector anti war anti british army anti RAF anti royal navy anti soldier sailor or airman,pro taleban, pro terrorist (IRA or islamist)pro communist pro green pro choice pro gay pro chavez pro palestinian pro castro/cuba pro al gore multiculturist pro union internationalist pro european obama obsessed pro US democrat pro alternative medicine pro islam anti democratic elitist luddite. Typically only reads the guardian usually ex member of swp or CND red wedge anti nazi league

2. Brainwashed member of the public blind to the above.

assoc. words see: Guardianista, Islington luvie, artschool trot.

derived from Beeb or BBC :anachronistic throw back to the 1950s when paternalist propoganda was encouraged on state monopolistic broadcaster. Now has no real role but remains the propaganda arm or the labour party/union movement/ green/extreme islam

Couldn't have put it better myself. Though the bit about having no real role might come as a bit of a surprise to the huge number of people enjoying, oooh, Top Gear, Radio 2, Today, Cranford, Chris Moyles, The Apprentice, Strictly Come Dancing, Have I Got News For You, Attenborough, East Enders and The Thick Of It. To name a few.

FAQ FAQ FAQ 2

The BBC's Environment Satan, Richard Black, asked a humdinger today: Why are virtually all climate "sceptics" men? It turns out that this was an appalling thing to say, so Biased BBCers marked the occasion by asking some searching questions of their own:

Why not ask why are most lesbians fat and ugly?

Apart from the ones in your special video collection.

Why do lots of beeboids take drugs?

Because the Taliban pays them in smack.

Why does the BBC believe that Gordon Brown can control the rise in global temperature, when he can't control the rise in mass immigration into Britain?

Because he's found a button marked Global Thermostat, but he can't find the magic wand which will make foreigners go away.

Why do biased environ-mental propagandists spend so much time polluting the planet flying en masse all round the globe reading The Guardian?

Because the in-flight magazines to Copenhagen are even worse than Flybe's.

Why is it the BBC always dress to the left (or rather flop limply)

It's gay code. It means they're gagging for a goat herd fantasy with Martin. On Hampstead Heath.

and bring Sarah Palin into everything if they can do some damage whilst Saint Obama gets a free ride with his unpopular big government ways?

Because Obama is an idiot and Sarah is not. Or something like that.

Why is it that the BBC manages to turn me from meek to angry of Mayfair?

Because all of the news makes you angry and the BBC provides most of it. Plus you live in Scunthorpe.

Why is it that those sceptical of the man-made global warming science, christians, right wingers, libertarians, little englanders, tories, against-multiculturalism, against islamification, against big government, anti-EU etc, etc should pay the licence fee?

Because it gives Marcus Brigstocke intense pleasure.

Why are virtually all Guardian "readers" handwringing pussies?

It's complicated, but basically all the assholes and dicks ended up somewhere else. Can't quite locate it just now, but it had a familiar ring.

FAQ FAQ FAQ

Martin, a little time ago, tried to define for Biased BBC readers the lifestyle of the typical liberal or, er, Beeboid. His was, as ever, an illuminating guide to another world. As a joint venture, we offer the following in-depth explanation:

Are our Beeboid/liberal lives sad?

Only when we read Atlas Shrugged's interminably dull postings. We just want to scream: "Make it interesting, for God's sake." But we don't. We cry.

Do we attend "cottaging" Islington dinner parties?

They serve something more interesting than cottage pie usually, so no.

Do we like to sit there boasting we've started a campaign to release some lifer scum or how we've just written a screenplay for the BBC on the imorality of life prison sentances.

Well we usually spell better than that, but, yes, lifer scum are what we love most. We have no fear of crime, you see, and we are determined to undermine justice just because we can.

Do we munch delecious lettuce and drink our tap water?

No, we don't find lettuce that delecious, sadly. Tap water, on the other hand, makes us happy because Panorama has taught us to hate bottled water.

Is our ideal evening out spent on Hampstead Heath getting some "bottom" action and doing a bit of crack

If the alternative is reading more of Atlas Shrugged's posts, then yes. Otherwise no.