One of the hidden delights of Biased BBC is the chance to join the big boys and to liveblog with B-BBC's keyboard commandos eminent commentariat whilst watching the BBC's Question Time. It's a highlight of several social calendars, and participants welcome each other by announcing what alcohol will be fuelling their impotent rage democratic participation in civilised debate.
What's especially interesting is that whilst posters on the main site are currently trying to live up to David Vance's latest crackdown on incivility, all and sundry let rip with abuse in this live fest of flying fingers.
Leader of the pack, unsurprisingly, is senior social commentator Martin. Here are some of his more enlightened views on Question Time and its participants, who included Labour's Yvette Cooper, the LibDem's Sarah Teather, Private Eye editor Ian Hislop, and M&S boss Sir Stuart Rose:
Sarah Teather her face is too small for her head Money grabbing hag GB is a tool Fuck off Cooper Oh shut up Teather So where are you going ot get the fucking money from Cooper you stupid bitch? No because we haven't spent the money on Trident yet you stupid cow Teather the Muzzie lover Cooper looks like an old dog 50% tax will raise jack shit and she knows it an arse What a lot of crap The public sector are not losing their fucking jobs That raises nothing moron PUblic sector scum Public sector scum need to understnad their wages come from taxes raised on private sector Another frigging Muzzie The envy from northeners, all they want is to live on benefits paid by others So what about Tony fucking Blair making millions? No he's just as fucking worthless I've never used a job centre, I have always looked for a fucking job myself Problem is too many fucking northeners don't want to work sorry but people in the norththink benefits are a way of life yes sh'es probably bone fucking idle All your constituents are Muzzie terrorists bitch places like Liverpool though are bone idle, I know people who come from there, the attitude to thieving and scrounging is unbelievable Liebour have always hated military as do the BBC Rose should have brought along some hotties in M&S undies Teather would have Bin Bag Mohammad as their advisor on Afghanistan Pakistanis are happy to blown anyone up Will Teather bring up Bin Bag mohammad? He lookslike special needs Hey rent a twat is on the sky Paper review
Biased BBC supremo David Vance joins in, too, though he couldn't quite decide whether to stick up for Ian Hislop or write him off as a Beeboid liberal, so he did both. Mr Civility also enjoyed some laddish badinage with Martin and the guys about whether M&S boss Stuart Rose would have been better bringing along some lingerie models. Apparently Myleene Klass does it for him. Who'd have thought?
(At 10.40 pm) Hislop is a little creep! (At 10.55 pm, without irony) Well done Hislop Muzzie alert Phew, wot a stunna she is! state sector parasite Cooper is revolting, isn't she? Mylene Klass would be good in her white bikini Paki is not offensive (At 11.36 pm) Hislop is right again - good man Look, nuke the Taliban and AQ, end of Kill the enemy. Simple. Nuke wazirstan as well, that sorts it....and then, Belgium.
We presume that high-def TV screens allowed B-BBC livebloggers to pick up the tiny images of mosquitos threatening to feast on the QT guests. It's inconceivable that Biased BBC would stoop to cheap abuse of Muslims.
Nor would they abuse leading female politicians, surely? The guys thought it hilarious that Yvette Cooper, who is married to fellow Minister Ed Balls, might suck balls. And perhaps she'd had her fill of Ed Balls. Fnarr Fnarr.
It is a little while since we last reminded ourselves of David Vance's mission statement, his gold standard of Biased BBC values, so here it is again:
B-BBC is and shall remain a place for civilised debate and attempts to suggest otherwise are pathetic.
Only Muzzie lovers would suggest otherwise.
Posts
Boy-Oh-Boy, Martins covered us all there other than himself. Perhaps Nick Griffin himself could learn a thing or two from the biased BBCs boy wonder.
ReplyDeleteIf, as Martin claims, he is only twenty, then how many jobs could he have possibly "Gone out and looked for himself"?
ReplyDeleteI mean surely given his towering intellect, he'll be currently attending some high brow university in the Oxford/Cambridge area, of this green and pleasant land.
where/when did martin claim to be 20?
ReplyDeleteIf you click on Martins Pictorial Moniker Link taking you to Yahoo, his alleged age is shown as - Oh yeah your right, he's not twenty, he's nineteen. Or so he claims anyway.
ReplyDeleteWell I asked if he had some sort of decent degree when he had a go at 'liberal' arts degrees and he said yes, and then he says he's 19
ReplyDeleteThe guy must be a parody
I'm sure I've seen him claim to have travelled widely with the forces. There was some talk of being an engineer, too.
ReplyDeleteDavid Vance pulls out the webcam again and welcomes us into his gracious home again to wield his mighty sword of satirical truth against Obama's Nobel Prize, Gordon Brown and his local heroes in the Stormont Assembly. It's, well, tedious as fuck, but at the very end he announces plans for a long holiday in New York and Las Vegas, where he hopes to win enough money to pay someone else to blog for him. If only. Perhaps we should have a whip-round?
ReplyDeleteDefinitely remember him referring to the forces, I think it was the RAF. Whatever, nowadays he'll be the creepy guy with lank hair hanging around the park.
ReplyDeleteI suspect army types would call Martin a "Walt".
ReplyDeleteDavid Vance's knowledge of military tactics look a little hazy, too. Nuke Al Qaeda?
Nuke a cell-based, terrorist network with no obvious or formal links, based exclusively in civilian areas?
Good idea, Einstein.
A less charitable observer than me might wonder if a few thousand dead brown civilians is collateral damage or a happy byproduct.
If it is the case that Martin is ex-forces, he presumably includes himself among the scum. If the forces aren't public sector, what is?
ReplyDeleteIn Vance's new video, he actually refers to 'colourful people' being let in (about 4 mins or so in). Sarcasm is wasted on him really. He'll never be a comedian, but bless him, he tries.
ReplyDeleteIf it is the case that Martin is ex-forces, he presumably includes himself among the scum. If the forces aren't public sector, what is?
ReplyDeleteI get it, this blog is supposed to be cool and ironic, real edgy stuff. well news flash - it ain't! Its just 18 year old humour rubbish. Are you obsessed with david vance or what?? you dont debate his points, or the numerous examples of bias on the site, you just lay into him.
ReplyDeleteDebating Vance would be pointless. Firstly he has nothing of any worth or value to say, and second all previous attempts by people on his blog to debate his points has led to him deleting their posts.
ReplyDelete"I get it"
ReplyDeleteNo, you don't. Leave it at that, old chap.
I think it better to be more constipated than educated rather than uneducated and have the kind of nonsensical diarrhoea that is B-BBC's bread and butter.
MCTE
ReplyDeleteOur advertisers were looking for a 14-year-old demographic. Screwed up again. Oh, well...
Serotonin
To be fair, Vance and I have debated many times. I say why I think he's wrong. And he says something about trolls.
Ex-Anon
I will never eat bread and butter again.
Which you probably then use as "lube" for your Islington "rent boy parties"
ReplyDeleteI just read the Question Time blog from last week and I think you are being prudish. If you have any sense of humour at all then some of the double entendres about Yvette Cooper's husband and her intimacy with parts of his genitalia were amusing.
ReplyDeleteGet a life.
Nigel
ReplyDeleteWill get a life and see if I laugh any louder at jokes about Ed's Balls. Must be worth a try.
Funniest bit, by far though, is David Vance's constant assertion that he runs a place for civilised debate. Split my sides every time I read it.