Friday, 18 September 2009

Rivers Of Blood, Part Two: The Cleansing.

Biased BBC strongman David Vance is about to launch a new era of blogging magnificence in which dissidents - sorry, trolls - will disappear from its pages. Being a Libertarian, though, he "welcomes all here who want to express a civil opinion."

Which is great news for legendary social commentator Martin, who is at his most civil in a discussion about a classic Vance rant essay on Appeasement:

Russia understands only one thing


that is strength.

Explains their drinking habits.

(as do Muslims)


The weak are crushed by the Commies

It's like 1989 never happened.

and Muslims also grind the weak into the dirt.

Turned that argument on a sixpence. Lionel Messi, eat your heart out..

The Israelis know that.

No kidding.

We will only ever have peace on this planet when every Muslim and Communist is dead.

Bit of turbulence beforehand, no doubt, but we get your point. Who will rid us of these turbulent Leninist-Marxist-Mohammedans?

The only way you can get what you want from a Muslim is to press a knife to his throat hard.

That's a lot of knives, Martin. (And a lot of blood.) Shall we order in bulk?


  1. What is it we're wanting from them that would require a knife being pressed against their throats? Their wallets?

  2. If I read him right, it's their lives. Or rather, their deaths.

  3. I thought David Vance was about to take time out from blogging in order to concentrate on, ahem, his new Biased BBC Book?

    Should be quite a potboiler...

  4. This books gonna be hilarious....just the sort of crap sky news will lap up. If its half arsed, controversial, and has no basis in fact, then you can guarantee it will sell.

    Might even make Vance really rich.

  5. I think you guys won't be able to comment after tomorrow night? You have to admit you have been a bit of a headache. What will happen to your blog then? Will it die out?

    C'mon DV ain't that bad. He's really ok when you get to know him.

    How about joining in?

  6. 'He's not that bad. He's really okay when you get to know him.'

    In my experience, anyone described in those terms generally IS that bad, and is NOT okay when you get to know them.

  7. David Vance will be missed by all his 'trolls', but the loss is mitigated by the knowledge that he is copying down Advanced Vance TM for the printed page. And I'm sure Vance will not be able to resist the odd post every now and again to keep the faithful excited.

    What I'd like to know is who is this new B-BBC fella the 'All Seeing Eye'? Will he be leading the troops while Vance is producing his magnum opus? Is he some kind of cyclopsian offspring of Martin and Cassandra?

  8. Vancinator: He is the esteemed author of the delightful Jacqui Smith is a cunt blog. Oh, and the Fuck The Fuck Off blog. Part of Mr Vance's estimable campaign to improve civility in the blogosphere, no doubt.

  9. Oh dear! It seems that the irony of inviting a sewer pipe blogger along to improve civility is rather lost on the BBBC crowd.

    Do you ever worry that these people are beyond parody?

  10. Vancinator: Hope not. What will I do for a hobby?

  11. Gosh - OMTE has an account - more than most have, there's no reason he won't be posting, unless DV just deletes what he sees fit

  12. Someone removed my comments from last evening,....? All they said were, 'this is still basic blogger' maybe its the picture of David Vance I have as my avitar wearing an 'I'm with stupid' T shirt. My humour isn't everybodies LOL

    I am in two minds whether or not to post again. I don't want to be part of something with no dissenting opinion.