Monday, 28 September 2009

Martin: The Video Which Says He Might Really Exist.


Never mind climate change and the fate of Gordon Brown. The hot topic of the day is the existence (or not) of the legendary Biased BBC social commentator, Martin, as he rampages through the B-BBC threads like some terrifying offspring of Nick Griffin and The Alien.

His, um, unique grasp of racial and religious issues, homosexuality and the degree of scumminess of each and every BBC employee stands out even amongst the wit and wisdom of the B-BBC commentariat. Sceptics, however, suggest that he's a figment of someone's wicked imagination...

As yet, we have not found definitive proof of Martin's existence. But our worldwide system of investigative YouTube watchers has obtained convincing evidence that he does have a first cousin, alive and well somewhere in the Deep South. (America, not Hampshire).

Here, in all his glory, he is...

(NB: it gets more - what's the word - revelatory the longer it runs. If you can cope. Turning the sound right up brings out the full aural flavour of the experience, too.)





If David Vance really does feel it's all getting a bit much for him running Biased BBC and compiling his best-seller on BBC awfulness, could we respectfully put forward this gentleman as the obvious candidate to take on the mantle of Bias-Finder General?

(A small finder's fee will suffice.)


20 comments:

  1. Well found!

    Martin appears to be on steroids over on the B-BBC comments pages, posting as much as all other contributors combined, shooting down anyone who doesn't toe the line with a barrage of expletives.

    He's really enjoying being king of the asylum now that Vance's new comments system has driven away most of the faithful.

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  2. Yeah martin has flipped today. I would love to see him Glenn Beck style on tv every night, it would be very entertaining. Frightening, but entertaining.

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  3. Martin, if that is you... I'd do you!

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  4. I think you're more likely to find Martin by trawlng YouTube videos of chimps throwing their turds at passers-by.

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  5. When he's stuffing his face with chewing tobacco (at 2:20), you'd find it hard to distinguish his precise place in the primate hierarchy.

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  6. According to this nice chap, Obama is a 'fucking nigger and jew'. Is it a parody? Probably not. I used to live in the deep south and there really are people that thick. It's sad, and a little funny, but mostly sad. As for Martin, Martin is not THAT fucked up.

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  7. nah, this guy is far more pleasant

    I truly do wish martin was real tho

    also, is it just me or is OMTE getting more comments than Vance now..oh dear

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  8. Tarquin you are right - the number of comments here is often more than at BBBC. All aided by Vance's new policy of exterminating dissenting voices.

    I see Scott M though is fighting back against the new regime led by Gruppenfuehrer Vance, who appears to be busy deleting any comments left, right and centre that dare to deviate from the BBBC line.

    Do you really want the figurehead of Biased BBC to be a person who's so afraid of dissension that he quietly deletes it and pretends it doesn't exist? Do you not think that his actions harm the whole site's reputation? ...If so, rise up and force David Vance to hold himself to the same standard he claims to desire from others. Otherwise, admit that you're happy for him to be a blatant hypocrite.

    PS: David - if you delete this message as well, I have a screengrab. Everybody will know how you censor opinions that point out your own hypocrisy.


    What chance Scott M being sent to the gulag by morning?

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  9. Lord Vance has always wanted to remove comments. He did it so often when he first arrived that some of the "regulars" started a new "Biased BBC" blog. Then he stopped, at least for people who got in their quota of gripes about dhimmis, leftists, feminazis, jew haters, socialists and toryhaters.

    I strongly suspect that the dissatisfaction with the old commenting system wasn't so much anonymous posting as the inability to remove off-message comments.

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  10. Out of interest was it not possible to remove comments under the old system then?

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  11. Didn't seem to be.

    I was banned under the old haloscan system for politely pointing out obvious and provable factual errors. Or rather, persistently pointing them out. Of course, I was a mere "troll".

    Under the new system, nobody got barred and in a few cases, the dissenting voices dominated - something that Lord Vance never tolerated before.

    Given that he's taken to removing comments and banning people the moment the new system came into place I'm pretty sure that it was either much more difficult or impossible to do so under the old system.

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  12. ok, we need a new website called 'b-bbc trolls', the debate is better!

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  13. Out of interest is "Martin" in the video complaining about the banning of flavoured beers? FLAVOURED beers?
    How gay is that?

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  14. Flavoured dips - a kind of chewing tobacco. Banned in most of Europe because of the health risks. From what I've seen, Obama's nothing to do with it, but our man wants to blame him anyway. Typical BBC ignoring another story because of institutional Obamaphilia....

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  15. Yeah, they just want to kiss his arse. Press their lips firmly to his taught buttocks and then slowly... Sorry. Started channeling Martin there. (Ou, Matron!)

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  16. Who taught Obama's buttocks? And what he teach them?

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  17. An Arseociate Professor, of course.

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  18. That's the funniest thing I've ever seen on youtube. Christ on a bike.

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  19. I think that this "Deep-South Martin" is like B-BBC's Martin; they are both subversive trolls. I can't believe either of them are real.
    As proof, I present: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTnKkl5wJck
    Smoke on the water, and fire in the sky ...

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  20. An improvement on Deep Purple, though not much. Wonder if he recorded his tune before or after another session on the flavored dip?

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