Monday, 10 August 2009

Taking Out The Jihadi Trash

It is a disgrace that the British Security services might have used information obtained under torture... No, wait: The real disgrace is that the BBC keeps mentioning it. And Biased BBC wants it to stop.

The voice of reason, David Vance, takes it very seriously:
in the aftermath of Islamistan murdering THOUSANDS of people in the USA, British security and intelligence services should have realised that their immediate priority was to ensure the UK did..not get involved in rendition or become complicit in any way with the "torture" of alleged Jihadists.

What really irritates me is not just the BBC's relentless undermining of the work undertaken by our Intelligence Services but the fact that ever since 9/11, the State Broadcaster has chosen to operate as a propaganda channel for every piece of Jihadist trash that has gotten as far as a microphone.


Wise words. As ever.

Perhaps we could clear things up for our security services, so that in future there will be no doubt that they always acted ethically and within the law. After all, we want the Jihadi Trash to understand what a powerful notion the democratic rule of law really is. Don't we?

Anyway, I propose a Biased-BBC Rules of Engagement to be offered to MI5, MI6, Special Branch and whoever else would find it useful in batting off annoying BBC people.

Perhaps Biased-BBC readers can help:

Do we want our security services to fit in with any of the following when questioning suspects:

1. The Convention On Human Rights
2. British Law
3. Sharia
4. Jude Law
5. None of the above

Who could best help our security services obtain information?

2. The News of the World's phone-hackers
3. Pakistani Intelligence
4. The gimp-master in Pulp Fiction
5. The Spanish Inquisition (No-one ever expects The Spanish Inquisition)

How should British agents act whilst in the presence of torture?

1. Look the other way.
2. Cough nervously and hope they get the point
3. Do the Telegraph crossword and ask for a summary at the end.
4. Pick up a cattle prod and say: "Next man in!"

What torture would be tolerable?

1. Toenails out.
2. Teeth drilled. No anaesthetic.
3. Electric shocks to genitalia.
4. Waterboarding. (Or snowboarding. In summer)
5. Reading Atlas Shrugged posts 24/7.

Would be useful to have replies before the Queen's Speech. Time to show our proud support for HM Intelligence!

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